Dil Bole Hadippa : Battered Cricket Wednesday, 23 September, 2009Posted by ~uh~™ in Bollywood.
Tags: 3CPSM, Anupam Kher, Cricket, Dil Bole Hadippa, formulae, gobar, movie, Punjabi, Rakhi Sawant, Rani Mukherjee, Review, Shahid Kapoor, Sherlyn Chopra, Yashraj films
This review was first published on PFC. [link]
Yashraj movies have always been rich in characters, content, colour, Punjabi and social messages (3CPSM). Every farm fresh YR produce makes life look like a fairy tale taking the audience into an world of happiness and love with an utopian impossibility, which cynics, critics and cynical critics brand as ‘entertainment for gobar audience’. What? You have never heard that phrase mentioned before? Well, now you do. Yashraj movies remind me of gobar (cow-dung) – for some people it’s the holy goo, an essential ingredient for purification, while for others it’s simply a lump of shit.
Dil Bole Hadippa is also not an exception; it’s not Chak De India, so it’s proves the rule of Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi. Let’s look into the 3CPSM in this case –
The black bhainslo – The most important character of the film, the anchor, the connection. It had a dialogue or two, which am sure the cattle class would decipher easily.
Shanno (Rakhi Sawant) – Well she doesn’t have a major role, but that’s never been a deterrent for her to showcase her talents and assets. She plays the role of a dancer in a nautanki and the depth of her character can be ascertained from her cleavage. She should have given some more screen time than the black bhainslo. The black bhainslo did not even dance like her.
Soniya (Sherlyn Chopra) – Less is more, that’s the bottomline for her. She is a former Miss Punjab (or was it Miss World) who has hots for Rohan. Her primary role was to wear meager shorts, generously oiling her boney legs and wobbling her scantily covered boneless pieces, in a stadium to stimulate the home team players.
Vicky (Anupam Kher) – He is a wealthy man who is separated from his family for the last 15 years for some unexplained reasons. In his haydays, he must have been a complete asshole to estrange a wife like Poonam Dhillon. He drives a Honda convertible that specializes in breakdown on the muddy tracks between paddy fields. He has settled in a small town in Punjab and dreams of winning the ‘Aman Cup’- a friendly cricket match played an(nu)ally between his and Lahore’s team. He also dreams that his family will return to him someday from London.
Lucky (Dalip Tahil) – He is an old friend of Vicky and owns the Lahore team. His team has won the Aman Cup for consecutive 9 years, so he is very sardonic to cricket competency of Indians. He is loud, wears dresses hired from a nautanki and addresses Vicky as ‘laley’.
Rohan (Shahid Kappor)- The muscular star county cricketer from England who carries a dictionary where the word ‘defeat’ does not exist. Must have been a second hand buy, I fear. He plays a multifaceted role – as a son he is obedient to his old man, as captain of the team he is a hard task master, as a man he is abnormally reluctant to acknowledge the stimulation efforts of Soniya and finally a love struck idiot who proves love is blind beyond belief.
Veera (Rani Mukherjee) – She is the niece of the nautanki owner ( Shri Vallabh Vyas), who generally fools around with a bat and nurtures the dream to make it big for Indian cricket team someday. So she sticks pictures of players on her room and practices with children below 7 years. She is a hard hitter and can bat on either hand at ease. She has the physique of a woman but energy and stamina of a buffalo. That’s why Rohan calls her ‘Buffalo girl’. Other than playing cricket she occasionally roleplays a male dancer opposite to Rakhi Sawant.
The movie has two modes, namely, the Romantic Mode and Sports mode.
Vicky tricks Rohan and brings him to play and win the Aman Cup for him. Rohan flies down to London and succumbs to his dad’s emotional blackmail and agrees to stay for six months. Veera, desperate to play in the team disguises into Veer, a delicate heavy chested sardar with a husky feminine voice, just by using some frugal facial hair and a pair of brown contact lenses. Rohan takes everyone to task to practice hard, but the players seem to concentrate more towards Soniya’s oily exhibition. One time, Veera accidentally drops her towel in front of Rohan- who after a quick glance and silent judgment covers his eyes, the first sign of platonic love. Veer quickly switched to Veera and successfully conned Rohan. But Rohan’s love grew over time and he tried to exploit Veer’s cricketing ambition in exchange of Veera’s company, unaware of the fact that they are the same person. He even hugged Veer couple of times but never realizes her as a woman. At this point, the movie goes into the Sports mode.
I will not spoil the suspense by describing the cricket. All I can say, I have never seen such cricket. Rohan’s team, who diligently ogled Sonya’s oily bobbles during practice sessions, collapsed systematically and consistently against the rival’s target score of 214. How 165 runs were made in 10 overs by the last wicket partnership and how fours and sixes were scored abundantly through shots yet to be named, can’t be explained in words. Did I mention Veera broke her arms but still continued batting ? Or about the winning four runs scored by running between the wicket ? Everything is fair in love and gobar. At the end not only Vicky won the Aman Cup, he also reunited his family, Rohan got Veera, Veera got a chance to give a lecture on gender bias, the people of Pakistan got basic education about gender equality and finally Yashraj stroke another mainstream nail on the entertainment coffin. There’s no bar for gobar.
Sample the picture below.
Pind da shera, Hadippa, Chak de Phatte, colourful dances, dhol, beautiful DDLJ references, sarso de khet, kudi di chunri, munde, lassi, rabid-jalebi, khatiya- almost all the essential Punjabi elements were present. The essence of Punjab is also explained with lucid verses – ‘Aa Gaye Ji Punjab Ke Sher, With Bhangra Bistar Beer Butter’ and
Oye Nach karenge touch karenge bachle ve yaara / Ajj to hum too much karenge bachle ve yaara/
Ajj discowale khisko bai desi beat bajani….In catchy upbeat tune.
Very thoughtful poetry like ‘Chewing gum hai chabbi jaa/ Hand pump hai dabbi jaa/ Pipe te jussa kaddi jaa “ is sung when the end credits roll, which probably explains YR philosophy of movies.
The movie elucidates many complicated issues simultaneously, just in case any audience fails to get one of them, he would catch the other. We have cricket, gender bias, family unity, India- Pakistan sensitivities all dovetailed within a love story. Howzzat?
I also think the movie subtly talks about the following causes, which did not miss my attention-
Economic recession and revival – Sherlyn Chopra started with paltry microgarments but finally wore a full length saree.
Professionalism- Rakhi Sawant just dances around and shows her tattoos but never talks.
Prevention of cruelty to animals- a bad joke on buffalo was objected by the female protagonist.
Sexual liberation- Difference between a man and a woman is just facial hair, is a myth. The difference can be exposed only by dropping a towel.
Other observations and inferences
Punjab is colourful. Farms are green; sky is blue and they paint their room dark red.
Rani Mukherjee is as cheerful, agile and carefree as a model of ‘Careless Whisper ’ advert.
Shahid Kapoor is working out too much. His sense of touch is covered by heaps of muscles.
It was not clear how Veera managed to tackle ‘those days of month’ during the heavy practice sessions over six months. But such detail would probably hurt Indian sensibilities.
Some cinematic details are deliberately avoided- like how the truck crossed the car on the single lane mud road. Again only cynical critics observe such foolish details and demand explanations.
On a scale of nudity and ugliness Sherlyn Chopra would score more than Rakhi Sawant.
Anupam Kher works with sincerity and conviction in whatever crap role he is put into.
In case you Wanted violence, blood and action this movie is not for you. If you look for qualities like logic and common sense in the script, it’s not for you. If you love cricket this is not for you.
But, if you want your Punjabi curry cooked in gobar gas, go for it.
Related Read ( Manually added)
Dheere se khana khatiyan mein: Dara da Dhaba Saturday, 18 April, 2009Posted by ~uh~™ in F&B ( Dawa-Daru), India, Mumbai, Videos.
Tags: Ayesha Takia Azmi, Balle Balle, Beer, Butter chicken, Charpoi, cool, Dara da Dhaba, Jungle Cooler, Mumbai, Punjabi, Pussy Foot, Takia, Video, Youtube
Punjabi is cool
If I were asked to categorize things in Punjabi, I would try this way-
(A) Punjabi Food: Sarso da saag, Makke di roti, Chikken- Shikken, Dal tadka, Charpai (integral part of Punjabi food), Lassi-pissi (not the MS member), anything Makkhan marke.
(B) Punjabi Music: Daler Mehendi, Dhol, Balle Balle! Bhangra, Sukhbir, Mika, Chak de Phatte, Daru-sharu (again, part of music)
(C) Punjabi Intelligence: Manmohan Singh, Siddhu, Khushwant Singh, Amrita Singh, soni- kudi (who says beauty and brain can’t co-exist?)
In Daras Dhaba I found A and B in abundance.
Since leaving Delhi, we missed the authentic dhaba food. We used to frequent Rajinder da Dhaba, which I believe is extinct now. Alternnative was Kake da Hotel. Then there’s the ubiquitous Sher-e-Punjab in Kolkata suburbs- where we get Bengali-Punjabi fusion foods.
In Mumbai there’s Dara da Dhaba- on W E highway it’s on the LHS, a km after Dahisar check naka. A colorful place to hang out with family and friends!
Ki gal Hai, Koi nahin
There was ample parking space available as we reached the place fore-noon. Am sure there would be mara-mari for parking in the evenings. The theme of the entrance gate is like a Lorry with a “PB” number plate fixed atop the huge Iron Gate.
Immediately after the entrance there’s a well-equipped tarot card reader with his maina and all, eagerly waiting to tell out future. I wanted to have some fun with my future, but my children did not allow me. Next was a pan shop. A large welcome sign, “Take care of your belongings, management is not responsible” greeted us to a large lounge separating the eating area with potted plants and shrubs.
As it was in the month of March it was not so hot and we decided to settle on the semi-indoor area. It is basically a factory shed with a very very high ceiling (but lower than Hard Rock Café). There’s an indoor AC restaurant as well, which probably is more popular in summer heat.
The seating is dhaba style with tables, charpois on either side with takias. The aish in takia was as good as Ayesha Takia ! However I believe the management uses my theory of ” comparative cleanliness” for the takia covers. So, we used ignorance as out takia-kalam! There’s hookka, lantern’s hanging from the ceiling, staff wearing turban and lungi making it look like a mini-punjab !
Daras Dhaba explained in one Mumbaiya word is Bindaas. No hang ups, no rules, no table manners. Simply good food with good music. Everything else to be chak de phatte.
Oye Pappe, khana shana laga de yaar !
They have an interesting looking menu card with loads of choices from juice-shuice, starter-warter, roti-shoti, kabab-shabab (alas, there was no shabab, only sharab), curry-shurry, desert-wesert. In short there’s a huge list to choose from. Interesting pictures of sardar’s in various cooking activities increased our appetite.
Reshmi kebab and Fish Finger as starters with beer, mocktails Jungle cooler (I dunno what it meant) and Pu8sy foot (huh ! MS doe’snt even allow to name mocktails, these days) ordered to start with.
There was a swing and few sliders, rockers placed in a kids play area to take care of the perpetual Brownian motion of the kids. I listened to the music played while waiting for the beer. Beer came after a number of songs. They mostly play Hindi and Punjabi songs from films and Indi-pop of Sukhbir, Daler, Mika genre.
After around a dozen songs, I realized the people who are serving us can’t be termed as waiters. In reality we were the waiters. We listened to the songs, slept on Ayesha Takiya, played with kids, drank beer, played again, yawned, drank beer…..and waited !
When they were playing ” O kake, maine pyar karke pashtaya” the starters arrived. I had gulped three beers by that time and was planning to take a sweet nap on the charpoi.
Roti’s does not take much time and actually one can monitor the progress as the roti’s are prepared openly in a kiosk in the same area. It’s the dishes those can make Rip Van Winkle blush in shyness.
We were scared that the main food might reach us by evening and desert by dinnertime. So we quickly settled for Murg makkhan wala, some more kebabs with some naan-shaan and Rabdi (deviless).
The associated ghas-phus items like salad, nimbu, chutney, achar and other paraphernalia were served on the house.
Ki fark painda?
Tasting the food made us forgot the time we spent on waiting. Its real-time Punjabi from all sense. I had never tasted so good Punjabi dish after Rajinder da dhaba.
In Delhi people used to tell me butter chicken is the national bird of Punjab. The murg makhkhanwala was so delicious that I am forced to dedicate the video to it.
Balle Balle !
So people who are bored with the strict mannerism of fine diners, love Punjabi food, have kids, plenty of time to kill for a meal in extremely leisurely manner, Dara’s Dhaba is the place. Khao, piyo, aish karo- bindaas !
I have heard the place throngs with people in the evenings and the waiting time is more than 45 mins during weekends. I am not sure whether thares ant place equivalent to this in Mumbai in terms of ambience, food quality and kid friendliness. The good thing is its near to my place and good food make us happy!
1. I have no idea how the veg food taste there. So ghas-phus people venture at your own risk. But those mocktails were too good, that much I can say!
2. The flavored hookka, Ayesha takia in charpoi after few beers can make you feel like a King. What the heck, it’s good to be a King (as sung by Tom Petty), once in a while. So be ready to pay like a King too.