Dil Bole Hadippa : Battered Cricket

This review was first published on PFC. [link]

Gobar-be-Que

Yashraj movies have always been rich in characters, content, colour, Punjabi and social messages (3CPSM). Every farm fresh YR produce makes life look like a fairy tale taking the audience into an world of happiness and love with an utopian impossibility, which cynics, critics and cynical critics brand as ‘entertainment for gobar audience’. What? You have never heard that phrase mentioned before? Well, now you do. Yashraj movies remind me of gobar (cow-dung) – for some people it’s the holy goo, an essential ingredient for purification, while for others it’s simply a lump of shit.

Dil Bole Hadippa is also not an exception; it’s not Chak De India, so it’s proves the rule of Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi. Let’s look into the 3CPSM in this case –

Characters

The black bhainslo – The most important character of the film, the anchor, the connection. It had a dialogue or two, which am sure the cattle class would decipher easily.

Shanno (Rakhi Sawant) – Well she doesn’t have a major role, but that’s never been a deterrent for her to showcase her talents and assets. She plays the role of a dancer in a nautanki and the depth of her character can be ascertained from her cleavage. She should have given some more screen time than the black bhainslo. The black bhainslo did not even dance like her.

Soniya (Sherlyn Chopra) – Less is more, that’s the bottomline for her. She is a former Miss Punjab (or was it Miss World) who has hots for Rohan. Her primary role was to wear meager shorts, generously oiling her boney legs and wobbling her scantily covered boneless pieces, in a stadium to stimulate the home team players.

Vicky (Anupam Kher) – He is a wealthy man who is separated from his family for the last 15 years for some unexplained reasons. In his haydays, he must have been a complete asshole to estrange a wife like Poonam Dhillon. He drives a Honda convertible that specializes in breakdown on the muddy tracks between paddy fields. He has settled in a small town in Punjab and dreams of winning the ‘Aman Cup’- a friendly cricket match played an(nu)ally between his and Lahore’s team. He also dreams that his family will return to him someday from London.

Lucky (Dalip Tahil) – He is an old friend of Vicky and owns the Lahore team. His team has won the Aman Cup for consecutive 9 years, so he is very sardonic to cricket competency of Indians. He is loud, wears dresses hired from a nautanki and addresses Vicky as ‘laley’.

Rohan (Shahid Kappor)- The muscular star county cricketer from England who carries a dictionary where the word ‘defeat’ does not exist. Must have been a second hand buy, I fear. He plays a multifaceted role – as a son he is obedient to his old man, as captain of the team he is a hard task master, as a man he is abnormally reluctant to acknowledge the stimulation efforts of Soniya and finally a love struck idiot who proves love is blind beyond belief.

Veera (Rani Mukherjee) – She is the niece of the nautanki owner ( Shri Vallabh Vyas), who generally fools around with a bat and nurtures the dream to make it big for Indian cricket team someday. So she sticks pictures of players on her room and practices with children below 7 years. She is a hard hitter and can bat on either hand at ease. She has the physique of a woman but energy and stamina of a buffalo. That’s why Rohan calls her ‘Buffalo girl’. Other than playing cricket she occasionally roleplays a male dancer opposite to Rakhi Sawant.

Veer and Rohan- the practice session

Content

The movie has two modes, namely, the Romantic Mode and Sports mode.

Vicky tricks Rohan and brings him to play and win the Aman Cup for him. Rohan flies down to London and succumbs to his dad’s emotional blackmail and agrees to stay for six months. Veera, desperate to play in the team disguises into Veer, a delicate heavy chested sardar with a husky feminine voice, just by using some frugal facial hair and a pair of brown contact lenses. Rohan takes everyone to task to practice hard, but the players seem to concentrate more towards Soniya’s oily exhibition. One time, Veera accidentally drops her towel in front of Rohan- who after a quick glance and silent judgment covers his eyes, the first sign of platonic love. Veer quickly switched to Veera and successfully conned Rohan. But Rohan’s love grew over time and he tried to exploit Veer’s cricketing ambition in exchange of Veera’s company, unaware of the fact that they are the same person. He even hugged Veer couple of times but never realizes her as a woman. At this point, the movie goes into the Sports mode.

I will not spoil the suspense by describing the cricket. All I can say, I have never seen such cricket. Rohan’s team, who diligently ogled Sonya’s oily bobbles during practice sessions, collapsed systematically and consistently against the rival’s target score of 214. How 165 runs were made in 10 overs by the last wicket partnership and how fours and sixes were scored abundantly through shots yet to be named, can’t be explained in words. Did I mention Veera broke her arms but still continued batting ? Or about the winning four runs scored by running between the wicket ? Everything is fair in love and gobar. At the end not only Vicky won the Aman Cup, he also reunited his family, Rohan got Veera, Veera got a chance to give a lecture on gender bias, the people of Pakistan got basic education about gender equality and finally Yashraj stroke another mainstream nail on the entertainment coffin. There’s no bar for gobar.

Colour

Sample the picture below.

Is love colour blind ?

Punjabi

Pind da shera, Hadippa, Chak de Phatte, colourful dances, dhol, beautiful DDLJ references, sarso de khet, kudi di chunri, munde, lassi, rabid-jalebi, khatiya- almost all the essential Punjabi elements were present. The essence of Punjab is also explained with lucid verses – ‘Aa Gaye Ji Punjab Ke Sher, With Bhangra Bistar Beer Butter’ and

Oye Nach karenge touch karenge bachle ve yaara / Ajj to hum too much karenge bachle ve yaara/

Ajj discowale khisko bai desi beat bajani….In catchy upbeat tune.

Very thoughtful poetry like ‘Chewing gum hai chabbi jaa/ Hand pump hai dabbi jaa/ Pipe te jussa kaddi jaa “ is sung when  the end credits roll, which probably explains YR philosophy of movies.

Social Message

The movie elucidates many complicated issues simultaneously, just in case any audience fails to get one of them, he would catch the other. We have cricket, gender bias, family unity, India- Pakistan sensitivities all dovetailed within a love story. Howzzat?

I also think the movie subtly talks about the following causes, which did not miss my attention-

Economic recession and revival – Sherlyn Chopra started with paltry microgarments but finally wore a full length saree.

Professionalism- Rakhi Sawant just dances around and shows her tattoos but never talks.

Prevention of cruelty to animals- a bad joke on buffalo was objected by the female protagonist.

Sexual liberation- Difference between a man and a woman is just facial hair, is a myth. The difference can be exposed only by dropping a towel.

Other observations and inferences

Punjab is colourful. Farms are green; sky is blue and they paint their room dark red.

Rani Mukherjee is as cheerful, agile and carefree as a model of ‘Careless Whisper ’  advert.

Shahid Kapoor is working out too much. His sense of touch is covered by heaps of muscles.

It was not clear how Veera managed to tackle ‘those days of month’ during the heavy practice sessions over six months. But such detail would probably hurt Indian sensibilities.

Some cinematic details are deliberately avoided- like how the truck crossed the car on the single lane mud road. Again only cynical critics observe such foolish details and demand explanations.

Itemized Nudity- Sherlyn Chopra & Rakhi Sawant

On a scale of nudity and ugliness Sherlyn Chopra would score more than Rakhi Sawant.

Anupam Kher works with sincerity and conviction in whatever crap role he is put into.

Recommendation

In case you Wanted violence, blood and action this movie is not for you. If you look for qualities like logic and common sense in the script, it’s not for you. If you love cricket this is not for you.

But, if you want your Punjabi curry cooked in gobar gas, go for it.

Related Read ( Manually added)

A webcomic review of DBH.